Avada Kedavra
by ElementalBlade
Summary: Voldemort reveals his return, and breaks the Statute of Secrecy while at it. Inspired by Avada Kedavra by Potter Puppet Pals.


Title: Avada Kedavra!

By: ElementalBlade

Loosely based on the song Avada Kedavra, a Potter Puppet Pals production

Tom Marvolo Riddle, or the Dark Lord Voldemort as he was more commonly known as, walked into the building in which the news was being broadcasted live. He had been waiting for this moment ever since his return. Now that his army was truly formed, he could now show his enemies that he had returned and was ready to take over the world. He intended to break the Statute of Secrecy, thereby informing pretty much every Muggle out there that there was magic. He wanted the non-magical folk to understand how they would die, after all, as well as to cause a lot of mayhem in the ranks of the Ministry of Magic. The incompetent fools had been denying his return for around a year now, and he was sick of it.

Striding cockily through the hall, he paused briefly at the door and listened.

"Is there any other important news, Bob?" the voice of one man was heard quite clearly from the other side.

"No, I believe you have it all the important information out there," was the reply.

"Good. Now, the weather-"

It was at this moment that Voldemort came in. Casually incinerating the door with a lazy flick of his wand, he strode into the room. Four Muggles were in the room; the two that had been talking, as well as another man holding a camera, and a woman who had been flipping through some papers in the corner. Silently paralyzing the four with a spell, as well as a bunch more of the Muggles who had run in from other doors around the room, he continued on walking forward.

"I believe there is one more item to be addressed," Voldemort hissed. He turned to face the terrified camera-man, and glanced into the camera, showing his face to England for the first time in fifteen years. "Hello Muggles around the world. I am sure you are wondering who I am, so let me give a little demonstration! However, I must first present a secret-one which has been hidden for centuries. Magic is real. Yes children, magic, as you read in those pathetic little story books you like to read before sleeping. Let me show you, in my introduction."

He raised his wand and flicked it. Music began playing in the background. Voldemort conjured a table and stood behind it, facing the camera, before he opened his mouth and began to sing.

"They call me the Dark Lord Voldemort,

I'm sucker for evil of any sort,

As long as I get to zap my foes away." He smirked before continuing:

"And boy I love this magic spell,

I send my enemies straight to Hell!

It's such a blast, I do it every day!

OK!" He spun around, pointing his wand at one of the Muggles.

"Avada Kedavra!" he commanded, almost lovingly. The poisonous green light erupted from the tip of his wand, and struck the man in the center of his chest. The man let out a half-cry before he was lifted off his feet and hurled backwards across the room before his body crashed into the wall and slid to the ground.

"Avada Kedavra!" The second jet of green light hit the second reporter. The man died with a choking cry, and his body landed next to the first.

"Avada Kedavra!" A third time he cried the words, a little more forcefully this time. One of the new Muggles was hit by the spell, causing him to give a rather high-pitched mixture between a sigh and a cry before his body hit the ground a moment later.

"It really rolls off the tongue," he proclaimed to the camera, the music still playing in the background. He turned to another group of three Muggles.

"Avada Kedavra!" The next Muggle died with a squeak.

"Avada Kedavra!" This Muggle died with a high-pitched squeal, as if he was falling from a great height.

"Avada Kedavra!" The final Muggle in the trio died with a low-pitched cry, sounding quite like a baby.

Turning back to the camera, Voldemort smirked, amused. "Killing people's never been this much fun!" he exclaimed.

There was silence for a few seconds, as the music continued, before...

"Check this out!" The music changed. Voldemort leapt onto the table and began to tap dance. After a few moments, he proclaimed proudly, "I'm the Dark Lord of town! ... ... Yeah!"

The music changed back to normal. Voldemort sprang from the table, his wand outstretched towards one of the three surviving Muggles.

"Avada Kedavra!" The Muggle died, sounding as if he was about to vomit.

"Avada Kedavra!" A scream sounding almost like a "Whoa!", and the Muggle's body smashed against the wall.

"AVADA KEDAVRA!" roared Voldemort. The last Muggle, the female in the corner, died with a scream of terror.

Now, the music slowed down. Voldemort pointed his wand directly at the lens of the camera, giving the Muggles watching TV a clear view of the tip. Slowly and deliberately, Voldemort spoke.

"Avada Kedavra!"

The music stopped. The final jet of green light zoomed forwards, the flash so bright that many Muggles blinked. The killing curse struck the camera, and the channel went dead.

Panic ensued in the homes of all the homes of the Muggles watching TV.

Satisfied with himself, Voldemort disapparated back to his hideout, cackling maniacally.


End file.
